Friday, June 26, 2009

Pop Icon Friday

Yaaaaay, it's Friday! *happy sigh* We made it through another week, and what a week! In keeping with the fact that I see death everywhere I look, three big celebs died this week, and no, I'm not still talking about my dog. Last night my Facebook feed was nothing but status reports concerning Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett. So, of course, rather than just ignoring it as I probably should, I need to dwell on it for just a mo' because they were important members of the pop culture lexicon, and dwelling is what I do. Bear with me.

Oh, and btw, I have nothing to say about Ed McMahon. He was old. He was on Late Night with Johnny Carson and Star Search. Recently, he wore a neck brace and had money troubles. That's really all I got. NEXT!

First of all, when I was a kid I LOVED Michael Jackson. Like, really, honestly loved him & wanted to have his babies and move to Neverland. Little did I know that at age 8 I was already too old for him and (allegedly!) the wrong gender. But, let's put the fact notion that he was a pedophile wackjob out of our heads for just a bit & focus on the muzak, ok?


The Michael I loved was the Michael from the Jackson Five, the Michael whose "Off The Wall" album was in constant rotation on my portable denim-covered record player. On Saturday mornings when I was really young, I'd slip downstairs super early to catch The Jackson 5 Cartoon. Yes, it existed, and I loved it! Hey, don't judge me. I also watched Hee-Haw, so WTF did I know?

To this day, if I'm at a wedding or out on the town (which admittedly isn't all that often now that I'm a boring old mom-type person), if somebody plays Don't Stop Til' You Get Enough, watch the fuck out, because Bev will work it. And if they play Thriller, expect to see some zombie hands.

Speaking of "Thriller", here's a confession I've never shared with anyone that I think you'll find both humorous and mortifying. My sister Debbie will remember this, because she was the only witness to it. I was maybe 8 or so when this happened, and it was Debbie's album, not mine. So I was in her room snooping around, which was something I did a lot back then (sorry, Deebs, you were interesting and I had no sense of personal space!), and I got out her "Thriller" album and put it on. Then I decided to have some fun with Michael, my big crush (shhhhh), so I got in her bed and opened up the fold-out picture of him in the white suit. You know, this one:

I swear to God, nothing happened. We were totally just talking! No funny business. BUT, Debbie walked in and caught me in bed with Michael Jackson, and I don't think she has ever looked at me the same way since.

I could go on and on and on about how much I liked "Bad" and how many MJ pins I had on my corduroy jacket, or how much I envied that trashy girl on the bus who actually had a red vinyl jacket with zippers just like Michael's. Bitch. But I'll stop now, because I've already over-shared and I'm afraid you're all gonna start looking at me funny, like Debbie still does.


Moving on... Farrah. What's to say about Farrah? She seemed like a nice lady, and she was incredibly beautiful, and I loved her on Charlie's Angels. I can't say that she was my favorite, because that honor went to Jaclyn Smith. Btw, I still love Jaclyn Smith, and I even watched that terrible Bravo show about hairdressers because she was on it.

I remember when I was young and my parents had some friends over for dinner, so I was left to entertain myself in the living room with my good friend, Television. What did 9-year-old Beverly Anne choose to watch? Why, The Burning Bed, of course!

Yep, a TV movie about an abused wife who can't get anyone to help her. SPOILER ALERT: After her disgusting drunk dick of a husband rapes her one night, she sets the bed on fire... with him in it. Rock the fuck on, Farrah! HELL YES. Also, Farrah was terrific in the movie, so don't let me hear you say she couldn't act.

So, there you have it: way more information than you needed (or probably wanted!) about me and why I am the way I am. Pop Culture junkies aren't born, they're made; usually out of too much free time, too much extreme weather, and too much access to movies, cable and satellite. I mean, it was northern Vermont, where the winters last 9+ months of the year! What else was there to do but read like a fiend and watch the same 80's comedies over and over again?

Ok, that'll do. Have yourselves a lovely Friday and weekend! I'll be out eating sushi and drinking dirty martinis with some girlfriends tonight. I will raise a glass to fallen icons and that will be that. Death sucks, and I've had about enough of it for quite a while.
Ciao, bella!
oxoxoxo

27 comments:

rkintn said...

Rock on, Bev! Pop culture junkies unite!!

I'm sick of the MJ coverage! Srsly! I think they should just show the Thriller video and move on. At the end, he was not the person he started out as..like most of us. The vultures smell fresh meat and it will go on ALL DAY!

Farrah..she was pretty awesome but had shitty taste in men. Namely, Lee Majors and Ryan O'Neal, both were rumoured to have abused her. I hear the special she made chronicling the last days of her life are pretty heartbreaking and I have no desire to watch it. She deserves some dignity.

Enjoy the sushi and dirty martinis:)

MtnMama said...

I feel ya, Bev.

Michael: We were kids together (I’m three years younger), so the Jackson Five were a presence in my early Motown-lovin’ youth. I adored them. When I was old enough to go out (and dancing was more of a draw than the drinking – believe it or not) I danced to Billie Jean and loved it. As he started to morph, though, I saw it as his rejection of himself, and I could relate to it less and less, until I saw him as a sad, mixed up mess, at best.

Farrah: I had that haircut – you should see my junior high graduation picture; it was before my hair grew dark – and I rocked the Farrah do. My hair is wavy, so I didn’t have to torture my hair to make those signature waves, and my friends were jealous, and the boys liked it. I think that was the most glamorous haircut I ever had. I haven’t seen the Burning Bed yet, but I could understand by then what stereotyping was and how hard it must have been to get people to accept that a pretty woman could be more than her shell. The way she went out I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

So this is what I’m doing on my last day of work. Hey, I sound productive!

Matter Of Fact Mommy said...

i just feel bad for Farrah that Michael Jackson died ON THE SAME DAY. i mean, she would have had WAY more coverage had it not been the King of Pop who shared a deathday with her.

anyhoo, i'm with rhonda - SO fucking sick and tired of the news coverage. in fact, i didn't even watch my favorite fluffy news show this morning, Today because it was ALL ABOUT MICHAEL. stfu already. ugh! and poor Ed. talk about being on the bottom of the totem pole in the death trifecta...

and you're totally not weird for snooping through your sister's shit. i used to do it to my sister ALL THE TIME.

Courtney said...

Another excuse to drink.... gotta love that!!!!

Bev said...

Such thoughtful responses this morning! And here I thought you'd all just rag on me for having a tete a tete w/ cardboard Michael! :)

Rhonda - yes, I'm already so sick of the coverage as well. But that didn't stop me from adding my $.02 here. HEE!! Oh, and yeah, Farrah had shitty taste in men for real! And her son (with Ryan O'Neal) is a real fuckwit, too.

MtnMama - Yes, watching him turn into a sideshow freak before our very eyes was certainly disturbing. :( Also, I'll be waiting to see some pics of you on your blog with your Farrah hair. And not patiently, either.... (read: prepare to be nagged... nicely! With love!)

Hey, and happy last day of WORK! WOOOOOT! YAHOO!

MOFM - Yep, Ed got the shaft. Hey, you know who's happy about all of this? David flippin' Caradine, that's who. heeeeee!!!

And, my fellow snoop, that's what little sisters are supposed to do! It's in the Girl Code. ;)

Bev said...

Ha ha... Courtney! Like we need one, am I right?

Chugalug, Whiskey Grrl! :)

calicobebop said...

I remember singing along with Thriller in the 4th grade with a few friends and when it came time for Vincent Price to do his thing I was the only one to say "hell." I was a REBEL!

And I watched Hee-Haw. No judgement from this peanut gallery!

Matter Of Fact Mommy said...

my sister is 11yrs older than me. i remember once when she was in HS and i was, like 6 or 7yrs old and she had a date come over. my sister was in the bathroom and her date was waiting in the living room. i shouted to her date, "SHE'S IN THE BATHROOM PICKING HER ZITS!"

she's never let me live that one down.

Bev said...

OMG! MoFM, that rocks AND rolls. LMAO!!!!

I read my sister's diary once... and got caught. That suuuuucked.

I also remember never leaving her alone when she had friends over. I'd sit outside her door and whine to be let in. Karma's a bitch. This is why my kid is kind of an asshole.

(I am contractually obligated to say: but I love him anyway. And I do.)

Calico - You are a rebel!! Awesome! Heck, you're a rebel just for admitting the Hee Haw thing. Thank you for that!

Samsmama said...

"Ed McMahon. He was old." You could have stopped right there and I'd have been cool with it.

Didn't he show up at people's doors and give them oversized checks for awhile there?

Michael. I liked him (a bit) when he was black. Never a huge fan. Really lost interest in him when he started dating Webster.

Farrah. I feel so bad that that kid toucher totally stole her thunder. I mean, for real! She got, what, 4 or 5 hours before he checked out? Rude.

"The Burning Bed" rocked!

Enjoy your weekend! I don't like sushi or dirty martinis. I will be drinking wine and eating cheetos.

Mala said...

Oh fine! Allow me.... a-hem.

BEV WAS TRYING TO MAKE IT WITH CARDBOARD MJ!!!!! *pointing finger and laughing*

What the hell, does she have dirt on all of you so you just ignored that scandelous fact??? Oh wait, she has tons of dirt on me...ummm. Bev, EVERYONE did that sort of thing. Yeah, that's it. No worries.

Oh, and I was that girl with the red pleather jacket complete with no less than 100 zippers. Actually, I still have it (yeah, we hang on to clothes around here FOREVER . If you are still struggling with the pangs of jealousy I'll let you borrow it... I just need it back for Saturday.

Kate said...

You keep me laughing as usual!
I had the MJ poster of him in my room wearing that cool red leather jacket.

LMAO about "The Burning Bed". I can admit it to that I watched this not too long ago on LMN (lifetime movie network) while Mia took a nap. The next thing I knew Mia was in my room and she was watching it with me...not too appropiate for a 3 yr old would you say but I could not change the channel. Please no judgemebts.

Have a great weekend and have a couple martinis for me.

Mary said...

ahhhh- I had such a crush on MJ too. But that when he was black- and a boy. In recent years? Not so sure of either.
But don;t let me hear ABC or I'll be there...I will sing at the top of my lungs, no mater who's within earshot :)
My daughter said to me today: "I bet Farrah is pissed at Michael Jackson for stealing her thunder."
I said, "well, since she's dead, I doubt she's pissed."
for some sick reason, we laughed our asses off.

Cary said...

Bev - I live for the day I can see you shake your moneymaker to "Don't Stop Till You Get Enough."

My grandparents made us watch Hee Haw with them, and I hated that shit. Never did see what was funny about, "You met another and PFFFFT! you were gone."

Eternal crickets.

Mala said...

"Where, oh where, are you tonight? Why did you leave me here all alone..."
yup, add me to the list of Hee-Haw watchers.. every Saturday night. What? I told you we only got one channel!

rkintn said...

"I'ma pickin' and I'ma grinnin!"
"What's for supper, Grandpa?"
Hey, I grew up here in Bumfuck TN it was against the law NOT to watch HeeHaw LOL

I had some college classes with Lulu Samples' grandson. He was a big, fat, stinky sumbitch!

Mala said...

Hey rkintn, is Bumfuck anywhere near Springfield, TN? I once lived their, briefly.

hee hee, word verf: imenati

Oh yes I have!

rkintn said...

Mala,
My particular slice of Bumfuck is about 2.5hours east of Springfield.

Audra said...

Ok I seriously snorted at the imagine of you in bed with Jacko making sweet.....conversation

Bev said...

Audra - yes, "sweet... conversation" is right! hahahaha!

Cary - I loved that Hee Haw song! "Searched the world over and thought I'd found true love..." Hilarious! :)

Mary & Kate - fellow MJ lovers! WOOHOO! Don't even get me started on how much I loved Duran Duran!

Mala - I'm gonna need to see that jacket. ;)

Rhonda - Hee Haw ruled. I say we start a fan club and make Cary the President.

Samsmama - I also like wine & Cheetos, but thanks to Friday night, I no longer like dirty martinis. :-/ Ow.

Cary said...

Ryan O'Neal is an oxygen thief. He's the one who should've died, not Farrah. What kind of fuckhat shares coke to his 10yo daughter?

Kate said...

1. Old people die all the time.
2. Hopefully Madonna will be next...GASP...I can't believe she actually said that....out loud even. Yeah, I did, suck it.
3. Did you get any cardboard cuts whilst making out, I mean talking, with MJ?
4. All of your other commenters crack me up.
5. The Burning Bed was awesome.
6. I hope to see you dance in person someday.
7. I feel like I have to be better than the other commenting Kate. Is that wrong? Thank goodness she doesn't have a blog or I would feel really competitive.

Mala said...

"Hopefully Madonna will be next..." Kate, I love you for always and always for saying that!

Kate said...

Holy shit! I just got some love from Mala!! I feel like I have been invited to sit with the cool kids in the lunchroom.

Bev said...

Kate, you're totally sitting with the cool kids! Oh, and on Tuesdays, we wear pink. :)

tonya said...

lmao i know i found this post a little late, but i had to throw my two cents in there, i had the purple michael jacket my sister had the pink one, and every week we watched Hee Haw and Solid Gold, remember that?? i loved those shows, i will admit it.

outdoor wedding venues said...

As we all know that MJ is not between us. Its a big lose for all his fans. But its nice to know see his young age photo.