Thursday, September 3, 2009

A b-day shout-out, plus: it's not a tumah!

First things first. Today is a special day! It's Cary's birthday! YAY! I wouldn't even know many of you if it weren't for his hilarious blog, so I'm grateful to him for introducing us. Plus, he's just a righteous dude, am I right? (uh yeah, I'm right!) Courtney already got him a cake, so I'm gonna go ahead and send the stripper over on behalf of all of us, mkay? Don't worry - I put all of your names on the card, so you're covered.

Mr. TheDay, you're under arrest... for being AWESOME!

Seriously, happy birthday, buddy! Hope it's a great one.

I feel so weird today. First of all, I've been sitting here all day thinking, "Maybe I should make a blog post," but haven't had much to say, so I didn't bother. Not that having nothing to say has ever stopped me before, but today I was just more apathetic than usual.

So let me tell you about how weird I feel so you can laugh at me, 'cause that's fun for everyone!

I've got a headache, a neck ache, and a stomach ache. I honestly feel like I am both hungry and full right now, which is kinda freaking me out. My bod doesn't know whether it's coming (I wish!) or going (not that I do that).

I'm pretty sure I'm coming down with either Swine Flu or EEE, but no biggie. Ha ha. Hypochondriac? MOI? Eff you, dude. I grew up with one of those and I'm probably the furthest thing from being one as a result. I hope. (feeling glands)

In the olden days (approx. two years ago) I would have Googled my symptoms and convinced myself that I had Meningitis or some crap. I don't do that anymore because the last time something was wrong with a loved one, I went to Dr. Google and proceeded to work myself into a state of hysteria for a solid week. It turned out to be nothing, and I felt like a genius when all was said & done. Take my advice on that one - step away from the search engine when it comes to medical info!

Alrighty, I think I'm done complaining and shmoozing for the time being. Hope you're all having a lovely day. Especially you, B-day boy!

28 comments:

Frank Irwin said...

I'm sure you've got nothing that a few (dozen) 6oz. bottles of LIGHT beer can't cure.

Elliott said...

I routinely assume I have a tumor, but amazingly, I feel just fine once I leave work.

wv: supreti - 'cuz u su preti, Bev!

Elliott said...

Oh, and I feel so blessed, I've finally broken into the top 10 commenters!

Except now I have a standard to maintain. Damn, how'd being cool suddenly become more work?

the iNDefatigable mjenks said...

If you need a second opinion to make sure it's not breast cancer, I'll volunteer my services.

MtnMama said...

No tumors here, but I think my computer has one...

I'm just lethargic and sleepy, but I think it is just letdown after all the pressure. no biggie.

Stacie's Madness said...

happy birthday cary (echo echo echo)

feel better...

Cary said...

Thank you, Bevers, for remembering my special day. You're a sweetie and I loves ya. Sorry you aren't feeling well today. I bet it's nothing that a lil' glass of wine or four won't fix!

verf = Rephica. One of my second grade classmates. She had a twin sister named Pharica.

Elliott said...

Oh, great lyric today, too.

Bev said...

I'm starting to think you all think I'm a lush! Oh, wait... never mind. ;-)

Frank - 6oz. Light Beers? Who would be stupid enough to buy tho--- oh, never mind.

Elliott - HA! You nailed it. I do have work-induced ailments all the time! Oh, and bonus points for saying I'm pretty. (BLUSH!)

Welcome to the Top 10! Keep up the great work, champ!

Jenks - Thanks, I'll keep that in mind. Such a generous offer!

MtnMama - For every thrilling peak, there is a boring valley. You still totally RULE either way.

Stacie - thx, girly!

Cary/B-day Boy - You are most welcome! I loves ya back, but you knew that. ;-)

In my life I have come across two sets of twins with ridic matchy-match names. The first set: Monica and Veronica. The second: Nia and Mia. WTF?

Samsmama said...

Ok, the whole "feeling glands" absolutely killed me! I do that no less than 4 times a week. And if they're not swollen I diagnose myself as 100% healthy. My eyes could be bleeding, but if the glands are good than I'm good.

onebadmamajama said...

Oh yes, I had a misdiagnosis via Dr. Google as well...Dr. Google is NOT your friend LOL

I hope you get to feeling better soon! You're not preggers are you? LOL

word verif: taxanas LOL

laurieliz said...

ummm, sweetie, you ARE a lush! But so am I and that's why I love you soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much!

Hope you feel better or get a flu and lose those pounds you wanted to lose...(my reason for LOVING a good flu)!


ohh...and Happy Birthday to Cary! I don't know you well but what I know, I like!

wv: hoeares (couldn't resist listing this one for obvious reasons)

Stuart said...

For a second I thought you were "feeling your glans" and it kinda freaked me out.

Then I thought about something else and it's all better now.

Oh and Happy Birfday Cary, you old fuck. I mean that.

Hugs!

Mala said...

Oh damn! Sorry Bev, I forgot the birthday card... you know that outfit had NO pockets.

Seriously, something is in the air. I've felt like shit for 4 days and have been actually considering calling my doctor to schedule my bi-decade yearly.

Mala said...

and 6 oz beers go great with breakfast... just like those little glasses OJ.

Brooklyn ML said...

I love how Mala's 6 oz boo boo is making an appearance in your comments.
Go ahead and feel your glands. Have some water, wash it down with wine, take a pill, you'll be fine.

Courtney said...

A shot of Whiskey will perk you right up.

Mala said...

Didn't we establish whiskey makes Bev's clothes fall off??? Or was that Tequilla?

hee hee - word verf is Phoof! The noise Bev's clothes make when she drinks whiskey/taquilla!

Elliott said...

And clothes falling off suddenly became a bad thing?

Bev said...

Samsmama - TOTALLY! The glands tell all.

OBMJ - BITE. YOUR. TONGUE. Pregnant? No. I think I'd prefer meningitis.

Laurie - takes one to know one, Boozie!

Stuart - Depends on whose glans I'm feeling, am I right? And, pray tell... what did you think of to get your mind off of me having glans? Hmmmmmmm?

mala - so your presecription is for me to start drinking, eh? I knew I loved you.

Brooklyn - I want pills. You know I love pills. Got any pills?*

*j/k**
** no I'm not

Courtney - That's your solution for everything!

Mala - it's tequila, which is why I only drink it once in a while, and only a little. NO shots of it, and definitely NO body shots. EVER.

Bev said...

Elliott - No. The answer is no. ;)

Cheasty said...

ha! having suffered from Ye Olde Swine Flu myself, I can with a high degree of certainty tell you that you are asymptomatic. hooray! hope you feel better soon, Bev.

Kristen said...

I hope you feel better and finally decide if you're hungry of need to shit.

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Mala said...

Don't do it Bev! Zyphyr is just trying to get you into porn!!!!!! "fun and not a lot of work", right?... wink, wink.
I'm not falling for that...again.

Samsmama said...

Oh, Mala! You are way too funny!

Stacie's Madness said...

hahaha mala...

outdoor wedding venues said...

Happy Birthday carry. Your blog is really very amazing. I will try to visit here continuously.