Wednesday, February 17, 2010

FB irritants

I have a few Facebook-related gripes to unload, so bear with me.

Has someone ever copied your status and gotten kudos from their friends for how funny it is, but they never admit that they stole it from you word for word?

This happened to me yesterday. I was reading my little news feed and saw my own status report - I had just posted it an hour or so before and people were commenting on it. I did a double-take; it was my status report, yet it had been posted by one of my friends. All of her friends had left "Ha ha! Your to funny" (grinding teeth) comments on it, yet did she 'fess up and say, "Actually, it's the Bev who's funny. I just thought it was a good one so I posted it too?"


It doesn't really bother me, don't get me wrong. It's not like I'm copyrighting my status reports, for goodness sake. I just think it's strange.

People are so odd.

Ever get copied on a never-ending message?

I was invited to a party several weeks ago. It seems the quirky (read: crazy) weather man at my last TV station was finally let go after the station changed hands several times and they're now focusing less on live news and more on, I dunno, Spanish-speaking cock fighting game shows or something. I don't know, I don't watch that crap now that they don't pay me to create it anymore. Anywho, a bunch of ex-cow-orkers were planning a party for Al and started a Facebook message to discuss the details of the event. There were about 20 people on the message list, including yours truly.

I decided early on in the planning process that I wasn't gonna go. My trusty sidekick was going to be out of town and I had my surgery to get through, plus it seemed like everyone who was going were Newsies and I was more of a Production Goddess.

Yet I kept getting the emails. Every. single. day.

Soon the messages deteriorated into "witty" banter about how drunk everyone was going to get, funny things Al might say, and "hilarious" reminiscences of the station's hay day. At this point, I just went ahead and deleted them without reading as soon as I logged into FB, but still - the multiple email notifications per day as well as the constant "housekeeping" on Facebook was reeeeeeeeeeeeaaaally getting on my nerves.

I'm a teensy bit OCD about FB, you see - I cannot have tons of unanswered messages or notifications glaring at me. I must get rid of the little red numbers before I can peruse people's status reports and leave my inappropriate and subtly pervy comments!

The event came and went, and I breathed a sigh of relief. Now, maybe I could get some peace from these incessant notifications about an event which I had no intention of attending.

Then the idiots went and STARTED A NEW GODDAMNED THREAD to rehash their fun night and start planning another one... in motherfucking MAY!

fkjas;fkjadsf;iae sdfasdjkfasdf; jasdfk;sdja;fijsd;fkasdj f;kdafj asdk;fjas;ifj;iadjrtio;werv!

(That's the sound of my head exploding)

So, lemme get this straight - I'm supposed to put up with 5-10 email notifications per day about a party I declined an invite to, and now about a party that I probably won't go to either... for the next 3 months?! Fuckin' A, dood. Stick a fork in me, 'cuz I'm done!

Okay, enough of me bitching. It's a beautiful sunny Wednesday, and I'm going to pretend that I didn't cry into Dr. Duk Dong's white coat this morning when he told me he wanted to fry me again and I told him where he could cram his radioactive iodine. The appt was a bummer and a total waste of good mascara, but the day is young and my good spirits will prevail, damn it.

Because they must.

Have a happy Hump Day, Humpy McGees!


Salt said...

I HATE being part of the neverending mail chain. There was a point where my name was on one that went for like 2 months. It was about like where everyone was going to meet up for the new Twilight movie and I couldn't even make it to the movie with them so I honestly couldn't have cared less about any of it. OMG it was so annoying.

I have never had my status update stolen before. I think I would be a mixture of irritated and also flattered that some weird person would think I was so funny. But then I would totally be the jerk and call them out on their page.

MtnMama said...

Since I am still a FB newbie, I wonder sometimes whether I perceive it differently than the "masses." Ok, I know I do. I am usually annoyed most by either the person who posts something vague and then NEVER responds to comments, or the ones who miss the irony in everything they post. Neither one of these being your style, of course, Oh Amusing One.
Oh, and the folks who reveal to the world how poorly they paid attention in school drive me nuts. I am one of those few who don't think illiteracy is Kewl.

Samsmama said...

Don't even tell me that someone stole your snowflake flurry comment?!?! Links are one thing. I got sick of reposting them with, "Thanks, whoever", because it's not like that person is responsible for it. But your status? Not cool. Not cool at all.

Sorry about the bad news. :( Happy Hump Day!

Mala said...

Wait! Someone stole your "I just gave Jim the best BJ of his life!" status!!! That's not cool! Not cool at all!

Seriously, if you figure out how to get our names off the never-ending, babbling, POS FB email, let me know. I don't even remember half those people.

Did Dr. Dong give you crappy news JUST to get you to cry into his white lab coat??? It's a thought. I hope he didn't suggest that giving him a handjob would make you feel better... or cure you all together.


Mala said...

Hey, at least your status updates are worth stealing!!!
I make sure mine are not.

Liz Tee said...

Wait... did someone say handjob?

Soooo shitty about your shitty news. :(

calicobebop said...

Yes, I hate the never-ending-email chain. I have one "friend" that only posts her status as an email to all of her 200+ friends. WTF? Who the hell cares?

Anyway, sorry to hear about the Dr. appt - sending you internet hugs!!

MJenks said...

I, too, must take care of the red numbers ere I go on to do any other idiocy.

I'm so copying your status updates from now on.

MJenks said...

Wait, Liz is giving out hand jobs?

Melissa said...

Bad appointment? Feck. Reeeally sorry about that Bev. You deserve to be free of this shit...

As for Facebook, I too am OCD about mine, so I understand your frustration. I never have notifications, friend requests, page suggestions or emails pending either... and you know, the shit part is trying to say something get removed from the recipient list will probably make it worse.

Bev said...

Salt - I was SO tempted to call her out, but I restrained myself....

MtnMama - I'm glad I amuse you, but what am I? A clown to you?


Samsmama - YES! That's the very one. Word for word.

Mala - He didn't ask for a handjob, but he did tell me I was "such a pretty lady" whilst gently wiping away the snot from my face, which I thought was kind of grody.

Liz - Of course someone said handjob! This is my blog, isn't it? And it's a day ending in Y, as in, "Why not have a handjob?"

Calico - Thanks, and here's a big ol' internet hug right back! *ooooooooh* felt good!

Jenks - Great, now you and Mary can BOTH plagarize me! Knock yo'self out. I'll just make sure they're boring and unfunny from now on. So there!

Melissa - Thanks, and I agree. Enufz enuff! Glad I'm not the only OCD FB-er out there, too!!

Senorita said...

Happy Hump Day !!!!!

I am not on Facebook. I don't know if I ever will be. But I feel that I have a blog, and a FB account would just be overkill for me.

I don't like it when people copy either. At the very least, they should immediately state that it wasn't their idea upfront instead of waiting to give the credit.

MtnMama said...

NO! Clowns are SCARY. (I thought we've covered that.)

Sigh. At least you're cute, Bev.

tracey said...

crap on a cracker you have to go all nuclear again. sucks.
on the bright side, there's a party coming up in may - it's going to be EPIC! you should come! we are all going to get SO wasted! hey remember the time...

wv - "forks" where all the hot emo vampires live.

Elliott said...

As those of you who have taken pity on my friendless soul and joined me on FB already know, I'm horrible with the status update. My current update, which I posted last week, was stolen from a friend who stole it from a friend, and was subsequently adopted by my sister and both brothers-in-law. Because it's funny.

Like Senorita, I have a blog, and now that I've figured out how to publish that blog across to FB without any extra effort, I figure that's good enough.

As for the little red numbers, I rarely get anything of note, so I rarely have anything to clear.

And I vote yes on Proposition 12 (ahem) I mean handjobs. (ahem.)

Organic Meatbag said...

I have been included on a few such emails (usually started by other bloggers), and let me tell you, it annoys the piss out of me...hahahaha

on the other hand, I am sorry they keep loading more shit on you, dear, but I guess it's just another excuse for you to show how bad-ass and unbeatable you are...we are all behind you :)

Bev said...

Senorita - No FB? See, I actually love FB, even though I complain. It's a love/hate thing.

MtnMama - Damn skippy I'm cute! I mean, have ya SEEN me? heeeee

Tracey - "crap on a cracker?" Totally rules! And yes... Forks. I hear it's lovely this time of year. I'd like to go Fork a hot vampire, for rlz.

Elliott - So wait, you're FOR handjobs? Huh. Odd.

OM - Thanks bruddah. And it's great that you're behind me, but stop lookin' at my ass! ;)

Elliott said...

I know it's odd and unexpected, but on important issues like this, I believe firmly that one must know where one's candidates stand, regardless of the backlash.

onebadmamajama said...

FB is definitely a love/hate type social network. I have found that deleting those that continue to annoy me there makes me feel good! lol

I'm sorry someone stole you totally awesome status update. As a person who only posts totally craptastic updates because she can think of nothing better...I understand the amount of thought and work that goes into it.

{{{HUGS}}} to you. I didn't realize that handjobs were an accepted currency at the dr's office! I believe that could go a long way in solving the whole healthcare issue!

Frank Irwin said...

Makes me glad that I'm not on Facebook.

Sorry for your earlier crappiness, Bev, even though it wasn't because of me, this time.