Friday, April 9, 2010

OOBH Stew: Drug-Addled Edition

There's so much stew this week, everyone! I had to put some into Tupperware to save for next week. Hope you're hungry!

Ingredient 1: More proof that dentists have the best drugs.

Here's a doped-up teenager talking about unicorns and shizz after having some oral surgery, then she busts out some mad rhymes. You go, girl!

Courtesy of Holy Taco

How much do I love (and relate to) her mom for recording her darling daughter's drug-induced blathering and then uploading it to YouTube?

A whole helluva lot, that's how much.

Ingredient 2: Why I *heart* Tina Fey.

That clip reminds me of my current favorite show, 30 Rock; in particular my new favorite episode: Anna Howard Shaw Day.

"One word: oral. Two words: Oral Surgery."

Here's my homegirl Liz Lemon doing her best to avoid all of the Valentine's Day hullabaloo. (Spoiler alert: she fails.) After having to admit that she has no one to drive her home after receiving anesthesia, she sees all of her ex-boyfriends (and a certain NBC-owned 80's rock star) in the waiting room:

Ingredient 3: A pinch of Tween Lust.

Apparently this Justin Bieber kid is some sort of pop star?

This is wrong, but does he look a wee bit special on the cover of People? Maybe it's the carefully-crafted bowl cut that he's rocking? He reminds me of someone.... Oh yeah, that's it.


According to my beloved Dlisted, even Justin tweeted about how bad he looks on the cover and says, "if u cant laugh at yourself u aint havin fun." Good lad! Now get back on the short bus because it's almost snack time. We're having ants on a log!

Ingredient 4: Whitney Huston is most likely back on the smack.

Color me shocked! No really, this is my surprised face.

Ingredient 5: Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey split up.

So a constantly self-promoting ex-playmate ("I'm not a doctor but I still think I know more than they do") and an actor ("I try to be funny to hide my crippling & debilitating emotional depression") couldn't make it work? Jeez, what hope is there for the rest of us?

Well, at least they didn't do something trite like announce their break-up on Twitter or anything. Oh, wait... never mind.

Ingredient 6: True Blood returns to HBO
on June 13th, and I already can't f'ing wait!

Um, HELLO! Pardon me while I wipe the drool from my chin!

Yeah, I cannot. wait. To tide you over until June, don't forget that the 11th novel in the Sookie Stackhouse Southern Vampire Mystery series comes out this May 10th! Yes, I buy the books the second they hit the stands, so?

So there it is. Hope you all enjoyed this latest concoction of mine. Good stew comes from good ingredients, so thank you, Pop Culture Universe, for smiling upon us this week!

Have a happy weekend, all!


Frank Irwin said...

Jim Carey needs to find himself some tanning cream.

Mala said...

OMG where do I start! My mouth is full (of stew!)! Wait, did you spike the stew? Me likes.

firstly, that video of that teen... c'mon! That's an average Friday night conversation between you and I! I told you last week we should get the camera rolling! I'm pretty sure that's EXACTLY how our conversation over dinner sounded. Jeebus and unicorns!

That Justin kid annoys me... I just want to comb his hair BACK! But good form JB= Arnie Grape. HA!
(holy frack! How did I remember his name?)

Rich Girl Red said...

Fabulous stew Bev! All I could think of watching the first clip was Jodie Foster in "Nell." "Like a teaaa in da wiannnnd!" I live in fear of someone videotaping some of my inebriated conversations. Damn YouTube, you can't even get drunk and accost potted plants or underage waiters anymore.

I work with the mentally disabled and they do NOT want Justin on their bus. They told me. Of course, one fellow also said Kermit the Frog slept under his bed last night.

Samsmama said...

I saw the doped up girl on "Ellen" the other day and about died. "Are you OK?"

I only figured out who Justin was in the last week or so. I had heard the name, but had no clue. Still don't care.

I love Tina, not a big Jenny/Jim fan. They're both so in your face obnoxious, and that sort of puts me on edge.

My husband had me look to see when True Blood started so we could sign up for HBO again. I swear he's straight.

Samsmama said...

Oh, and I'm not sure if Jenny belongs in this drug-addled post. Isn't she against modern medicine? Or something like that. Clearly I'm a fact checker. Also, a certain lovely Mama from the Mountains just shared the dentist girl link with me on FB and my comment includes a reference I think you'll appreciate. ;)

MJenks said...

Yeah, Biebler does look a little like Corky in that photo. Well, kind of a bastard child of Corky and Brady Quinn.

If you don't know who Brady Quinn is, he used to play football at Notre Dame and he looks a lot like James Franco.

Bev said...

Frank - WORD.

Mala - You're right, I'm pretty sure that our convo at the movie theater sounded very much like that of a drugged-out pair of teenagers!

And yeah, I want to smack the mop off that Justin kid's head too.

RGR - Nell! Awesome. And how cute is it that Kermit now makes housecalls? That is one lucky kid!

Smama - Dudes love True Blood too - and why not? Sex, nudity, perversions, violence? It's the total package, really!

Off to check out the FB scuttlebutt!

Jenks - Thank you for explaining who Brady Quinn is, because yeah... I don't do sports. ;) Don't hold it against me, please!


jessica o said...

I have never seen this Justin kid, and I have tons of little girls. People's claims don't add up. You don't suppose there was some PR hype in that story, do you?

Also, Ava said of the True Blood dude, "Dat guy nekked."

Poor pop stars. They had a rough week.

calicobebop said...

TruBlood! Swoon!

MtnMama said...

Oooo! Sorry I'm late, but (I swear) I was at the dentist letting him admire his work. We both agree he did a stellar job. They even invited me to stay for lunch, but since I still can't eat properly, I declined.
As an ex-dental professional, they love me, but it didn't extend far enough for him to discount his fees! :(

I loathe Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey. Probably because my nephew has Aspergers and their approach to Autism is so fucked up. Or something like that.

Whitney slid off the wagon into a huge steamy pile of road apples? Oprah must be already preparing the "Where is she now?" show. Oh, wait...

Tina Fey is my hero, and the fact that she included "Drew" just makes me love her more. (y'all know about my Mad Men obsession, right?)
I can't even stomach Justin. Eeeew.

meleah rebeccah said...

Tina Fey is my flippen HERO!

Cary said...

Can you imagine being the child of Jim and Jenny? You'd never get a word in.

The Jimmie Walker/Whitney pic cracked me up.

Heidi Renée said...

I own a Justin Bieber CD. Clearly I'm as on top of things as that unicorn girl.

Mala said...

We went to the movies??? And we had a conversation??? during the movie?

Oh man, I had to watch that video again. I can totally relate to the difficulty of controlling one's eyes... both at the same time.

Bev said...

Jessica - He sure is nekked! And HOW!

Calico - YES.

MtnMama - I hate Jenny too, and am only sort of down with Jim Carrey.

Oh, and Jon Hamm was a welcome addition to 30 Rock, believe me! Cutey patootie!

Meleah - Me too!

Cary - Glad you liked it! It makes me giggle every time... but I'm kind of easily amused.

Heidi - YOU DO? Really? Wow. Good thing I already like you. ha ha!!

Mala - Yes! See ya tomorrow! Can't wait to see that lazy eye in action. :)

Brooklyn ML said...

Thank you for posting that insanely hot picture of Alexander Skarsgard. I almost rubbed my computer all over my body, but my husband was sitting next to me, thought he might be jealous.

Senorita said...

I can't stand Justin Bieber. He looks like he has a bad twitch in his face.

I can't believe even grown ups are into him.

onebadmamajama said...

I gotta give True Blood another try! WOWZA!

Elliott said...

I was accosted by the Justin Bieber People Magazine throughout the airport on Friday, and I honestly haven't a clue as to who he is.

And yes, I chortled out-loud-edly at the DiCaprio picture. Because that's honestly how I visualize Leonardo DiCaprio in EVERY SINGLE FILM HE MAKES. Because it's funnier.

And the Whitney 'JJ' Houston pic is pretty nice, too. Now I'm sorry I waited so long to check blogs!

Salt said...

THANK YOU! FINALLY I know when the premier for True Blood is!!! Oh thank god I didn't miss it. That picture of Eric is pretty much my fave ever.

PS I don't know how I'd feel if my husband could fit in my swimsuit.

Nej said...

Tina Fey...I love her more and more. What a nut!!! :-)

Not sure who Justin Bieber is...but his publicist and/or manager need fired for letting that picture go on the cover. (giggle) It's horrible. :-)

True Blood, love it! I started buying the books after they'd been out a while, so I was getting them in paperbacks. This is one of those times my OCD tendencies can get annoying. Now, I have to have them all in paperback. I just (yesterday) finally got the last book, now that it's in paperback. (sigh) :-)