Monday, June 14, 2010

They're all gonna laugh at you!

Good morning, my sweet, poo-flinging monkeys! Did you all have a good weekend?

I did, but I'm afraid it left me tired, bloated, and groggy. But enough about Lindsay Lohan - we'll get back to her in a minute.

I've been fighting off a cold for about a week now, so last night I took a PM cold tablet and I think I'm still struggling out of the murky depths of my sedation today. So writing this post should be fun. Wheeeeee!

Last Friday night on a whim I made a Facebook page for the OOBH, which was kind of a big deal for me. As my regulahs know I've been blogging here for a while now, but until now I never really told many people from my "real life" about the blog.

If you're not already a FOOBH on Facebook, what are you waiting for? Clicky, clicky, people!

The other night it occurred to me that I make no apologies for being a ridiculous potty humor-loving perv here on the OOBH, nor do I hide who I am IRL, so why not open up the blog to my world at large? Then I can post those nifty little blurbs on Facebook and get more eyeballs looking at my words, which makes me happy because I crave attention. I don't want to just post the OOBH blurbs to all 250 of my Facebook friends because... well, my mom's on there, and a few cousins, and some distant relatives who are far more religious than they are hilarious, if you know what I'm sayin'.

So I started a fan page and I hope you'll all join so we can be besties. I promise not to inundate you with posts. I am a good Facebook friend, I swear! References available upon request.

You observant types may have also noticed that the blogaroonie got a little work done over the weekend. A few people told me that the old design colors were hard to read and I'd had those fears as well, so I did a little nip here, a little tuck there, and voila! A face lift. Hope you likey.

Okay, enough bidness. I don't have much else to report except that Rockin' Ribfest was fun yesterday and I ate too much delicious food and drank too much delicious beer, hence the bloat. I'm back at work today and was considering faking a seizure to get myself out of here, but now I guess I'll tough it out somehow. It's almost lunch time, after all.

One last thing. I would like to propose that we ship Lindsay Lohan off to Texas indefinitely. After all, poor Chace Crawford was just enjoying some quiet time in the parking lot of a TX bar with a (totally-non-sexual, I'm sure) male friend last weekend when he got busted for possessing a single thin joint. Now he faces up to 6 months in jail. For a joint.

Yet Lohan, who has clearly been eating her feelings lately (NTTAWWT*), roams free in L.A. and doesn't even get in trouble when she violates her probation by publicly getting her drink on at an awards show... AND drunk-Tweets about it.

Just sayin'.

Have a groovy day, all!

*Not that there's anything wrong with that.


Heather said...

I had a great weekend and didn't want it to end either so now I am thinking of taking your idea and faking a seisure... Thanks for the positive influence.

Samsmama said...

That's Lohan???? Holy hell.

I'm happy to be one of your first fans on FB. And LOVE the new look! I swear, you don't look a day over 25 followers.

Kerry Meyers said...

You are brilliant!! If Texas won't accept La Lohan, ship her to Thailand for sure.

onebadmamajama said...

HoLo really really needs rehab and some incredibly intense therapy. Also, publicly flogging her parents would probably help, too.

A Ribfest sounds pretty dang awesome! A celebration of meat with can that be bad?

We took a fun, but extremely hot and humid, trip to the zoo Saturday. I'm still trying to recoop.

I'm proud to follow you on FB and I love what you've done with the place:)

Kari said...

Blogger follower? Check.

Facebook friend? Check.

Twitter pal? Check.

Facebook page fan? Check.

Jesus, Mary and Joseph, am I stalking you? And if so, are you okay with that?

wv: gashle - the gaping hole in Ashlee Simpson's face from which "music" comes out of (I know, I'm at least 3 years too late for that joke, but I couldn't let the opportunity pass me by.)

Melissa said...

Love the blog layout!

And really, Hollywood justice... *sigh* I'm still waiting for her to die or go to jail. I'm getting impatient.

Bev said...

Heather - You're welcome. You can always count on me to convince you to leave work early.

Smama - I know! You are the bestest bestie EVER. Thanks for your support.

Kerry - HI! Thanks, girly, and thanks for reading. I think Thailand is an excellent idea....

OBMJ - Definitely rehab and public flogging for her parents. Glad you had a good weekend, despite the heat. We froze here!

Kari - YOU RULE!!!! Stalk away, sistah-friend. I can take it!

Melissa - Thanks! Glad you like the new look. I'm with you on the Jail/Death Watch....

Rich Girl Red said...

Sorry you've got a cold, Bev. My hat's off to you for taking cold medicine. It makes me feel like I'm swimming through Jello the next day. Not my best look.

HoLo really needs to go away, like now. If she spent more than a couple of days at The Betty she might straighten up some. Or not.

Love the new look and if Kari's a stalker, so am I. (NTTAWWT)

MJenks said...

From the looks of her knees in that picture, she's been putting more than just the tip of a beer bottle in her mouth, if you catch my drift.

And I know you do, because you're a perv like me.

When I got the page suggestion invite, all I saw was "page suggestion" and then I rolled my eyes, expecting it to be another lame thing about Jesus Juice and the Under-18 Crowd. *eyeroll* Like the Judge wasn't specific enough on that one.

Anyway, you can imagine my delight in seeing that it was a fan page for OOBH. Giddy with glee and the warm glow of pounding my wife raw, I clicked on the follow/fan/like/where's-the-naked-pictures button immediately.

I've thought about making a fan page for Vita Brevis, but I'm still on the fence about it. I kind of like the excitement that comes when some random stranger surfs into my life and follows me. Plus, I'm always afraid that my mother will somehow ruin my blog fun.

Salt said...

Is that seriously La Lohan!?
Oh and of course I'm a fan of you wherever you go!

Harmony said...

Wait, page suggestions were sent out? Maybe I was too quick and became a fan before the page suggestions took place. *wide-eye eager look*

We had a good weekend over here, Ryder just celebrated his 4th birthday...very exciting!

On Lohan..whatevs. Everyone should just ban her from their consciousness..that will be her ultimate prison, not existing.

Bev said...

RGR, I usually shun cold meds too, but last night I really wanted to sleep the sleep of angels so I succumbed.... Still coming down today, though. UGH!

I LOVE that you're my stalker. I stalk you all right back, so it's consensual, at least.

Jenks - Damn straight I'm a perv like you, m' man! We birds of a feather all flock together. Thanks for being a FOOBH. I'd be a FoVB for you too, but I understand about the mom sitch. I'm fortunate that my mom never pries too much. I'm certain that she doesn't pry because she doesn't want to know what a perv her daughter is....

So it works for us, ya know?

Salt - Thanks, and back at'cha!

Harmony - Happy Birthday to Ryder! Yay! And yeah, I know I'm kind of obsessed with Lohan. As Melissa said, I just have this odd fascination with watching people self-destruct. I'm just waiting... waiting for that day that Liho snorts one too many lines....

Yes, it's macabre. I know. *shame*

Heidi Renée said...

If you hadn't identified that picture as Lohan, I would have said it was Carnie Wilson.

PorkStar said...

My weekend sucked for the most part, but glad to know y'alls relish in such activities as relaxing and being healthy. : (

Mala said...

Does that mean LaLohan is off her diet of blow and desperation? Or has she just added Twinkies and corn dogs to it?

Love the new look. I no longer need to wear my blue blockers to read it.

MtnMama said...

Three things occurred to my whilst reading this:

Oh, so I'm a person from your imaginery life? I guess I'm cool with that.

6 months for a joint? I'm so glad I'm back in *long intake* Denver.

How pathetic that Lohan makes even being average sized look pathetic and wasted?

Oh, and, like Jenks, I only saw the page suggestion and didn't inquire further. oops. Off to correct that now - since MY people in real life are seldom on their 'puters. Hence the 25 FB friends in total of which most of them are you all. *sigh*

(wv: indurr - I swear, if I have to indurr one more picture of that skanky tramp I'm gonna howl.

Senorita said...

Oh, I totally likey the new bloglift.

I am trying to get over a cold right now, and it's brutal. It just won't go away :(

LiLu said...

Chace is way, WAY too pretty to go to jail.

Just sayin.