Friday, September 17, 2010

OOBH Stew: What A Boob! Edition

Happy Friday, my lovely BOOBHs! Who's ready for a weekend? I know I am; I've been limping through this week while fighting a very strange on-again/off-again cold, so I'm ready for some R&R. We're also picking up our new kitten this evening, so I'm excited about that! I haven't had a kitten in over 14 years... so this will be interesting. I've warned the kids to expect lots of scratches and bites, but something tells me there will be tears as they get used to kitten behavior. Oy.

Anyhooters, despite my lingering cold I managed to throw together some yummy OOBH Stew today. Don't worry, I wore rubber gloves and a hairnet to keep my germs contained. Dig in!

So there is such a thing as "too big."




According to Oddee.com and Guinness World Records, this woman has the largest natural breasts in the world. Ouch!

Oddee sez:

In 1999, the Guinness World Records declared Norma as having the Biggest Natural Breasts in the world and also the owner of the largest bra. Her measurements at the time were 70-48-52". Her bra size was 48V. Each tit weighed 28 pounds and she weighed 270. Since then her tits have grown up to 72ZZZ and she tops the scale at 345 pounds.
YIKES!  Almost 60 lbs of boobage?  That is just plain crazy-talk.

We've been HAD.

Well, we would have been had if we gave a crap, I guess.

It's been confirmed that Dave was NOT in on the joke.
Remember when we all watched Joaquin Phoenix go off the deep end and turn into a mumbling, unkempt "rap star" who thoroughly embarrassed himself on Letterman while promoting his "documentary," I'm Still Here?  Turns out, it was all a publicity stunt in the name of performance art.  Filmmaker Casey Affleck admitted to the NYT that it was all a ruse.

Sadly, according to the reviews I've read, knowing it's fake won't make this movie any better, though maybe the knowledge will ease the nausea caused by seeing Joaquin (allegedly) get shat upon.

But probably not.  ::shudder::

What? You mean Kate Gosselin doesn't really look impossibly good? Get out!

Courtesy of WWTDD

People magazine Photoshopped the bejezus out of that one, eh?  Sure, Kate looks like she works hard to keep her figure trim and I've seen legitimate pics of her on the beach where she is rocking a 6-pack, but the People cover is yet another example of how the media takes someone who already looks fine by normal societal standards and turns them into completely smoothed-out androids with zero percent body fat and not a blemish in sight.  It's bullshit, and I'm sick of seeing it.  I actually want to see the beautiful people's warts!  This is why I adore the bottom-feeding paparazzi for keepin' it real.




Btw, it's a well-documented fact that Kate had a tummy tuck and lipo to put her abused bod back together after having a litter of kids, but she denies having had a boob job.  Uh huh.  Suuuuuuuure, Kate.






A funny Facebook pic.

This one's been making the rounds on FB this week and it made me giggle:
Cockroaches and Cher, right Rich Girl Red?  ;)


Finally, a bit of randomness that is both completely bizarre and guaranteed to get stuck in your head:


From IAmHilarious

"Ooh, that's dirty!"
"Do ya think so?"

Ha ha!  I likey.

Hope you enjoyed it, my dears.  Catch you on the flip side!

11 comments:

Samsmama said...

72-24-36...only if she's 8'9.

I remember the episode where Kate went in for her tummy consultation and the doc told her that her boobs were actually pretty decent, she just needed to invest in good bras, and he didn't enhance them at all. Clearly, once she got "famous" she got a second opinion. She obviously eats well and takes care of herself, and that's great for her, but that photoshopping? Puh-leaze. That woman makes me so sick.

Glad you are feeling better! I think I'm finally on the mend, but my sleep schedule is still all jacked up. I'm worn out! TGIF!

Rich Girl Red said...

Delicious stew, Bev! Hahahaha! Yes, Cher and the cockroaches. Togetha foreva.

I'm with you on Faux Kate. They must have used all the Sunset Tan ink available to cover the stretch marks on her belly. Just be real people. Why is that so hard?

That video was funny and disturbing at the same time. "Get on my horse!" "It tastes like raisins!"

I'm glad you're feeling better and hope you have a great weekend! Good luck with the new kitteh.

Harmony said...

Congrats on the new kitten!

And? I thank you for that fabulous song! Love it! "Mmm Mmm sweet lemonade" I'll never drink it again. LOL

Bev said...

Smama - And she's even BIGGER now. Yikes!

Yeah, Kate's boobs like totally new to me. A good bra works wonders, but not miracles.

Glad you're feeling better!!

RGR - Thank you! Maybe I'll enjoy a nice glass of sweet, sweet lemonade this weekend.

Harmony - Haha! You're welcome. I'm glad you liked it too!!

Mala said...

I'm with you! Why the hump cam't they just acknowledge they're real people. Is it so bad?

And my back hurts just looking at that lady. Jeebus! Lob 'em off already.

RawknRobynsGoneBlogWild said...

I feel sorry for Norma. You'd think someone would offer to reduce those things (surgically, that is). Perhaps she likes holding the record..?
xoRobyn

ISRAEL CARRASCO said...

I wasn't had, it had stunt written all over it. It was a bad version of Andy Kauffman who was actually very funny.

Heidi Renée said...

And I thought my tits got in the way.

The Facebook thing is ruined for me because Caesar is spelled wrong. :( I forgot to check my inner spelling bee contestant at the door today.

MtnMama said...

I know what you mean, but somehow my brain is rejecting the word "natural" in the same sentence with that Guiness winner's boobs. Good grief. Just the other day, a few of us "mature" women at work were discussing time's effect on boobs, and I pointed to my elbow and declared "They are supposed to stay above this line - that's what the bra is for!" At the point where your bra is making up a new alphabet, all hope is gone.

Bev said...

Considering the fact that I crank my tits up to my chin using any means necessary, I cannot imagine letting them hang down to my knees like that, world record or no world record!

Reduce, reuse, recycle!

Cary said...

I'd do Kate. But I'd wear a condom. One kid is enough to support.

Love the horse vid. Stealing that.